You’ve seen The Big Lebowski, right?  If you haven’t, go rent it.  Or add it to your Netflix queue.  Now.  As in immediately.  It’s a Coen Brothers film and it’s absolutely hysterical.  But no, this isn’t a movie review.  I’ll leave those to the professional.

This is about bowling and, if you haven’t seen The Big Lebowski, be prepared.  Just like watching Big Night makes me ravenous for good Italian cuisine, watching The Big Lebowski makes me want to go bowling.  Fortunately, I live in Erie where opportunities to roll, whether on Shabbos or any other day of the week, are plentiful.

When my mother was much younger, back before I was born and for a while after, she was in a bowling league.  I still remember the ball she had was a blue marbled color.  She kept it in the front hall closet in a black and white bowling bag, along with her bowling shoes and other requisite bowling accoutrement.

In addition to her league (I can’t remember if she bowled every week or every other week), she and my dad would take us kids bowling every once in a while.  My childhood bowling memories include:  not being able to lift even the lightest ball available so one of my parents would place the ball on the line and I would run up to it and push it and, because they didn’t make bowling shoes small enough for my wee little feet, I got to wear my fuzzy pink slippers.  And, back when I was a kid (walking to school in ten feet of snow, up hill, both ways) there was no bumper bowling.  There were gutter balls.  Lots and lots of gutter balls.

As my mom got older, she either got bored with bowling, it fell out of fashion, or both.  But at some point, she gave up her big blue bowling ball in favor of a bunch of much smaller blue balls – raquet balls.  I don’t know what happened to her bowling ball – she probably sold it at a garage sale – but I do know what happened to her bowling shoes.  I have them.

I don’t know what make they are, nor do I know for sure what size they are, but they’ve got to be either a 5 or a 5.5, because they fit me.  And I wear them whenever I go bowling.

No, those aren’t the original shoelaces.  And, if you’re wondering what that writing says, it says “This End Up,” which is a testament to the age of those shoelaces.  This End Up is a furniture store my cousin worked at in, I believe, the late ’70s or early ’80s.  So, yeah, not only are the shoes technically antiques, but the laces are nearly antiques.

Obviously, I have some great memories of bowling as a kid, but I still like to go as an adult.  I’m not interested in bowling in a league or anything (and I doubt any league would want me… I kind of suck), but I do enjoy going once in a while.  Unfortunately, the last time we went, the smoke was so bad (the guys in the lane next to use had three packs of cigarettes stacked up next to the ashtray and they were lighting new cigarettes with old cigarettes before they stubbed them out) that we pretty much had to give up any idea of going again.

Until now.  For some reason, we thought that bowling alleys had an exemption from Pennsylvania’s smoking ban but, when I decided to write this blog entry and made some calls for information, I found out that bowling alleys are smokefree.  Whoo de Hoo!  It looks like I can don my antique shoes once again.

And you should give it a shot, too.  If you don’t think you’re in the mood, just rent The Big Lebowski.  Seriously.  You’ll be ready to roll in no time.

Now, depending up the location you choose, the cost will range from about $2.25/game/person to $3.00/game/person and shoe rental (if you’re not lucky enough to have inherited a pair) ranges from $1.50 to $2.00.

As for times each lane has open bowling, that varies greatly and I would suggest calling ahead to find out exactly when the lane you’re interested in can accommodate you.

Here’s the information I found regarding bowling alleys in the Erie and (for our fearless leader) the Meadville area:

Greengarden Lanes, 1583 W. 38th St., Erie, 864-2642

Eastway Lanes, 4410 Buffalo Road, Erie, 899-9855

Eastland Bowl, 3729 McClelland Road, Erie, 825-5990

Classic Lanes, 2230 Broad Street, Erie, 455-2695

Rolling Meadow Lanes, 3304 Zuck Road, Erie, 838-7681

Edinboro Lanes, 222 W. Plum St., Edinboro, 734-1713

Lake City Lanes, 1402 Lake St., Lake City, 774-4733

Westway Lanes, 8674 Ridge Road, Girard, 774-4071

North East Bowling Lanes, 180 W. Main St., North East, 725-4988

Bowl-Aire Lanes, 216 E. Washington St., Corry, 663-3772

Lost Lanes, 160 Grant St., Cambridge Springs, 398-2265

Lake LeBoeuf Lanes, 12674 U.S. 19, Waterford, 796-4621

Plaza Bowling Lanes, 18799 Smock Highway, Meadville, 724-2144

Cochranton Lanes, 142 W. Pine St., Cochranton, 425-2681

Lakeside Lanes, 1040 State Highway 18, Conneaut Lake, 382-6906

So, whether you’ve got kids and are interested in creating some fun family memories or you’re an adult and think Midnight Glow Bowling (Greengarden has Glow Bowling on Saturday night from Midnight to 2:00 AM… unlimited bowling, including shoe rental, for $10/person) sounds like a blast, go give it a shot.  It’s pretty reasonably priced and a fun time.

Now, if we can just get a bowling alley to have a Lebowski night – show the movie on the wall, encourage patrons to dress as their favorite characters from the movie, and bowl for the duration of the film.   Now that would be awesome.  But, hey, that’s just my opinion, man.